A lot of things happened during last week.
On Sunday, my Father, his wife Macarena and my younger brothers José and Juan arrived to spend a couple of days with us here in France. We had amazing days together. It´s really beautiful to realize that, even though I feel everything changed in my world the connection and love with my family always remains.
On Wednesday I had my most busy class since I came here. It was a big challenge: those days when you don´t have enough props and the energy it´s really high up inside the room… A really beautiful experience, for sure! I feel so grateful for being able to feel that!
On Thursday my brothers and I went out skiing. I was super excited to ski with them. The day was perfect: sunny and beautiful, and after having three days with my dad and Macarena my heart was full of warmth family love.
We really enjoyed the day but when we were coming down to town I fell backwards hurting my knee. I couldn´t stand up any more. It was super painful and I felt really scared because I fell in the middle of a really narrow piste… The good thing was that Juan was waiting for me just a few meters below because he saw that there were rocks on the piste and he warned Jose up and his idea was to do the same with me… but I fell before that.
I couldn’t move my leg until at least a few hours later. My hip and ankle were perfect but my knee was really unstable and aching. The rescue people came and took me down the slope where an ambulance was waiting for me.
In the hospital they took x-rays and we saw that my bones were in great conditions (lucky me!) but obviously something happened with my ligaments. My ACL was probably under too much tension and it stretched too much… Or maybe it can be twisted or even broken (crossing fingers and toes for a NO on this one!). We don´t know yet what happened because I need to take a MRI scan during the next weeks to be completely sure.
I had two options: The first one was feel depressed and sorry for myself because I can´t teach for (at least) a couple of days, my practice needs to change totally, I won´t be able to enjoy skiing with my brothers anymore and I need to pay for the rescue.
The second option was to see this as an opportunity.
For two days I was in the first option. I guess I was kind of shocked because this is my first accident ever, but yesterday I decided to change my mind completely. Two days were enough. And, you know, enough is enough.
Here you have the list I created of positive things that are already coming and will come with the accident:
–LOVE: I´ve been feeling so much understanding and love from people I never expected. All the students were really concerned and they sent me beautiful messages and emails full of good energies. Also, Andreas and my brothers are taking really good care of me, I´m so lucky to have three beautiful nurses. My leg is injured but my heart is full of love!
–EXPERIENCE: As a yoga practitioner I always heard my teachers telling things like: “An injury is an opportunity to learn”, “Pain is your master” or “Listen to your body”… In my own experience as a yoga instructor I´ve been saying that when it came the time to help someone with a specific condition. Well it´s my time now. It seems that now it´s the moment to put all that knowledge on myself and heal myself through yoga practice. If I´m able to do that, my FAITH in yoga will be even bigger based now on my own experience.
–INSPIRATION: I´ve been thinking a lot on Guruji´s history… He had two really big accidents during his life and he needed to start his practice from nothing. I feel really lucky because what happened to me is not even closer to that but the truth is that even though he always is a real inspiration to me, in this moment I can feel his experience even more close to my heart motivating me.
–PRACTICAL THINGS: I will learn a lot about travel insurance, international health care, bureaucracy and it will be a big opportunity to practice my French.
I really believe that I´m responsible for my own reality, I don´t understand that much yet how and why I created the accident but the list above helped me to deal with it. I believe that when the energy is stuck, things like this happen, the energy needs to move, if it doesn´t move, it explode!
I guess I´m learning that trough my knee. Knees are not just anatomy, it depends on the way you look at it.